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Ugly Presents

My wife is a world class wrapper. Like her baked goods, the presents she wraps always look great. This creates an odd situation at Christmas time. Under our tree are dozens of presents, most of which look great. Then there are the presents bought for Sharon. They look like they were wrapped by someone wearing boxing gloves.

I am not a world class wrapper. My son John might be worse and Chris and James seem to always get someone else to wrap the gifts they buy. T.J. wraps like his mother but he is too busy with his own family to coax him into doing my wrapping. So we have a living room with many, many beautiful presents, with tight crisp corners and straight cut wrapping paper and we have a few gifts with bunched up corners, jagged edges on the wrapping paper and an over abundance of tape trying to make up for the wrapping imperfections.

The only advantage to this Christmas tradition of ours is, it’s easy to tell which presents belong to Sharon, Christmas morning – the ones that look like a goat may have wrapped the presents. My presents, T.J.’s family’s presents, Chris’ presents, John’s presents and James’ presents look like they were wrapped by Santa’s elves.

It’s so nice to get a beautiful present on Christmas. It’s too bad Sharon hasn’t known that feeling since she left her mother’s house. I’d feel bad except what I lack in wrapping skills I make up for with my cooking skills. Christmas night I will prepare a prime rib which will make her forget all about her ugly presents. It will be a work of art in it’s own right. It will be cooked to a perfect medium rare the way we like it. It will melt in our mouths.

How do I know? Because I cook it every year using my father’s recipe.

It’s the only way I can make up for my goat like wrapping skills. Well maybe not the only way but we can’t mention the other way. This is a family friendly blog after all.

prime rib dinner Christmas

Last Years Prime rib

So if you have any flaws you need to atone for on Christmas, go down to the store and buy a nice prime rib. Follow the link above to my Dad’s recipe and make everyone forget about any thing you did that wasn’t quite perfect.

It not only works for wrapping. It works for one too many drinks on Christmas eve or buying the wrong sized clothing also. A tip from a husband of 23 years; when in doubt always go small. It’s better than hearing the old “Just how big do you think I am?” Another tip; never, ever answer that question. Puncture you ear drum with a sharp pencil and fake deafness if you have to but don’t answer that question. There is not enough prime rib on Earth to fix that mistake!

If I we don’t talk again…….Merry Christmas!


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